Monday, September 8, 2014

We're On To You, Vladimir

As "Tales" is a big sports fan, and with the opening weekend of the NFL [Yeah, Texans!], I hope you don't mind this repeat satire post from this last April.  "We're On To You, Vladimir."  It is a Tales exclusive exposing the fraudulent vote of the people of Crimea supposedly expressing their wishes of independence from Ukraine to join their "mother" Russia. 

April 4, 2014: "We're On To You, Vladimir":

Putin in shades or the shady Vladimir
Yes, Russian president, Vladimir Putin, thinks he has fooled the world with the "vote" in Crimea that supposedly had the people of Crimea by a 95% margin begging to be unified with the Soviet Union...errrr...Russia.  But we are on to you Vlad!

Check out these headlines that the Tales legal team of Wie, Cheatem, and Howe have discovered for this Tales exclusive: 

Yes for Russia "...won more than 99% of the vote in 100 precincts" [in the central section of Crimea]

We're all in for Russia baby, "Got 100% of the vote"  [in the west suburbs of Crimea]

"What Luck" the yes vote for renewed unification with the Russian homeland "Won Dozens of Districts...With 100% of the vote"

The article "Vote Was Astronomical in some...wards" in Crimea, points out that while the total voter turnout in this area was 60%, we are led to believe that more than 90% turned out in these wards within that area.

The article "Election Fraud" points out how in the "fly over" portion of Crimea, the yes vote was 100%, I repeat 100%.

"Study Reveals Possible Double Voters in North" [Crimea]

Yes, we got you Vladimir...headlines like that and we are to believe that the vote by Crimeans to break away from Ukraine and join Russia was an honest, fair election.  I think not, Vlad!   Ha, the jig is up!

Hold it, wait a second...

I have just been informed by the Tales ombudsman, Mr. Bigmouth, that while these were actual headlines, and they have been proved to be totally factual, that they were not headlines from the vote in Crimea, but in the re-election of president Obama in 2012.

Never mind!

P.S.With the unfortunate mis-portrayal of headlines given to the Tales by the once reliable [although I can't exactly remember when that once was] Tales law firm of Wie, Cheatem and Howe, the Tales will soon hold a board meeting of every executive member [me] to see if they should be replaced with the potentially more reliable legal team of Ari,Yew, Kidd and Mee. [say it fast]


bradley said...

Awesome, put this skit on SNL, the audience will fall out of their liberal seats!

Big Mike said...

Hi Oooooooooooooooooooo! :-)

Anonymous said...

Nice post.
Maybe you would be interested in checking this too

Big Mike said...


88keyman said...

As an attorney, I feel obliged to advise you that if you must use the law firm of Dewey, Cheatem and Howe (or was it that other firm?), stick with Dewey or Howe and stay away from Cheatem. I just don't trust him.

Big Mike said...

Tales will give that constructive advice great weight as we go into our board meeting! :-))